The Pessimistic Pansy


My life is rather wonderful right now.  When I contemplated writing about my life, a thought immediately popped into my head.  “I’m not experienced enough to write on this topic.  People will just assume I believe my life is wonderful because I only have one baby.  And they often have said, “Wait until I have two, or three, or four, or ten, then maybe I can give my opinion.”

I had to cast away that thought quickly, choosing not to give heed to the person who would discredit my happiness.  You know the person I am talking about.  This person sees you young and in love, and says, “Just wait until after the honeymoon, then you will see what life is really like.”

You know these types of people, don’t you?  They wish away your happiness.

This happened to me a few times, so with a little fear, I waited until after my honeymoon and oddly enough found that I was still happy—really happy.

This person said, “Wait until your first year of marriage, then you will see what life is really like.”  Again, wishing away my happiness.  So with a bit of fear, I waited for my first year of marriage and found after it was over that I was actually still happy—really happy.

This person saw my happiness with a bit of disgust, and they said, “You are still in the honeymoon phase, and wait until you have kids, then you will see what life is really like.”  And once again, wishing away my happiness.  So with a bit of fear I waited for the birth of my first and found that after she arrived I was happy—really happy.

This person then said, “Wait until you have two little ones, then you will see what life is really like.”  And once again, wishing away my happiness.  However, now I do not anticipate that next phase in life with fear.

After experiencing these different phases, I have come to realize that my happiness is not contingent on my circumstances or the phase of life that I am in.

I am happy while single.

I am happy while married.

I am happy with one kid.

I am happy with ten kids.

I am happy because my happiness is rooted in Christ Jesus.

“As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you.  Now remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father’s commands and remain in his love.  I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete” (John 15:9-12).

I am happy because I remain in his love and his joy has made mine complete, which is indicated in the phrase “lacking in nothing.”  I have entitled this post “The Pessimistic Pansy” for two reasons.  First of all, this person whom I am describing ispessimistic.  They have a negative outlook on life, not finding their joy in Christ, and therefore not being complete in him.   And secondly, this person is a pansy— meaning weak or fearful.  Their happiness is rooted in their circumstances, so they fear each new phase, and resent those who are genuinely happy.

I choose to be confident that I will be happy no matter my circumstance, because my happiness is rooted in my salvation in Christ.

I remain in Him and He alone sustains me and offers grace for each new season of life.  So, without fear, I say, bring on the babies!


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